Wednesday, January 30, 2008

rmb it for life.

k shall cut my whole ytd happenings before we met up for movie real short.
i managed to do a few projects and my some of my project mates finally "responded" and start to do some project work and they did really great jobs! thank God for them!=) and there was another project that i need to hand in by this week and i also managed to complete most of it. praise God! i may not need to chiong like crazy AGAIN haha! i've been doing that for 3 weeks including this weeks and past 2 weeks. praise God that i get to take it more easily for this very last week!(i have around 2 to 3 more presentations tho, if i dun rmb it wrongly its not very tedious haha. thank God!)

thank God i made it in time for the movie tho i had to stay back in school to do project and in fact i managed to eat dinner with the rest of the group=) yiqin had a china friend with him to join us for the movie. oh we are watching cloverfield for the day. movie had some good parts but a REALLY REALLY lousy ending. some of my friends in the cg even tried to boycott the movie by shouting or saying to ppl randomly. "don't watch cloverfield" while we were on our way to the toilet after the movie lol.

we went to the arcade, i was really tired as the day before i fell aslp while trying to decide on what to do for certain things before my laptop and woke up at 5am+ and slept back. probably din get a gd slp haha. some of us played and some of us jus simply watched. towards the end of it, me and yiqin decided to play RF5(rock fever 5) haha. interesting lol, that certainly perked me up.

after that yiqin and joseph went to follow up on our new brother in Christ! and so only me, newell and the china friend(k he's called gaoteng) left to hang around somewhere partly cos we din wan to go home yet. so we walked around and went passed tm's e-zone(arcade again!) and went to sit in one of these spoiled house of the dead machines. i wanted to jus slack and talk, at the same time know and help to connect gaoteng even more. we talked abit and i decided to show them some of the pictures and videos that our caregroup have taken in the past or recently.


(here comes the part of the day which i really felt that i have lived the most stupidly and felt the really stupid. literally, and im serious.)
there was this middle-aged late 20s to early 30s guy that slowly approached us. the 3 of us thought he wanted smth from us, like trying to see if the machine is working and so we looked at him and asked if he wanted something. and he started to ask if we wanted a fight cos he thinks we were staring at him. and so we explained to him the situation that we wasnt and even said alot of sorries although we werent at fault at all. and he started to keep asking why(fyi: he is not crazy.) and each time sort of more irritated, and to what i see he is like some gangster that is trying to pick on us. and i thought for a moment that he may be aiming my laptop since i was using it to show the pictures and videos.

so i was thinking of hw to get rid of him nicely, so that no one would be harmed in any way at all. then he insisted for us to go outside of tm and "settle the matter" with him. and after awhile i agreed, saying that if only he would let gaoteng go first with me and newell left to talk to him. he promised nt to harm us too so i guess it was ok. he jus said to go down first. upon reaching the ground floor i suggested to talk at mac since it was a public place and he wudnt dare to do anything. but he jus kept walking the other side telling us that there is too many people there. and on the way out i told gaoteng tt i will try to hlp him get out and he will find yiqin and at the same time bring my laptop away.(by this point of time, i was determined to hold onto my laptop no matter what happens as well. for e.g. he trys to snatch it away, i realli was prepared to fight for it haha..) hwever no matter hw mani excuses i tried to make, he jus said it would be only a small talk.

he says that there is a few ways to settle the "problem"
and he asked if we want to have some "backing", i think i was realli quite daring in a sense haha cos i actualli told him that we are not interested, in a nice way tho.
and he gave us a few options
1st: Fight 1 on 1 with him
2nd: Call people down and fight.

i looked at him and told him that these two options would be impossible as well since we would obviously lose out and we dont belong to any gang or of any sort. i told him in the nicest way i could think of, of course haha.

then he called us to let him see our ICs and i was like "shucks, i dunno if i brought my IC along with me." but in any case i would have said i dun have it with me because i noe that he wanted the IC because it shows our addresses at the back. and so i offered him the ez links instead, he took it and took our ICs down saying that he could track where we live from that.(i noe its not possible because i've studied or heard smth bout this before. unless they are police or frm the authorities.) and he told us to sit down somewhere jus a few steps away to talk. and so i asked him if there was any other choice out of it.
he gave us two other choices:
1st: Open a table for him and his "friends"(gang or some sort) to drink and we would pay the bills
2nd: we pay him an "angbao" of $369.

and i looked at him again and told him it is not possible for us to get the money at all. he asked hw much we have on us and HAHA praise God! i just used the money to bless my caregroup members while we bought tidbits for the movies and so i didnt have much money left and i wasnt a single bit worried bout him checking my wallet HAH! i wud rather give to my caregroup members a thousand times over than to give him. think he was disappointed as well haha because we were "poor" haha. and so i somehow bargained with him, and the price dropped til $120. and he said we can give it to him slowly but we had to let him keep our handphones with him as a "garantee" that we would give him the $120.

alot of things happened and then he left with gaoteng's handphone and newell's handphone and returned mine. mainly because mine was jus a basic phone haha! and so i decided to get gaoteng home first and to get newell to my house before we discuss on what to do next. but gaoteng didnt want and in the end we decided on joseph's house. called him and i purposely made us took bus 34 to my house's bus stop then we walk to joseph's house so that if anyone was even following us they wudnt be able to follow us. went to joseph hse and discussed it with yiqin and joseph on what to do.


yiqin asked me a few questions like, "why didnt we call for help even tho we were in a public place" and questions as such as he didnt understand my actions and was curious. and as he asked, i agreed to what could have been done and that the possibility of the guy jus trying to con of us the phone was alot higher. but however, i felt more and more stupid as yiqin asked. i felt worser and worser tho that was not his intention. and the only answer that i could think of that makes the most sense is that, i do not how to handle the situation well though we were calm throughout everything and so i told him that i needed other things else that would help me more on my current situation other than things that would make me feel worse.

we went to the police post and made a report on what happened. and along the way i think yiqin tried to explain that he was jus trying to bring across what could be done if there was even a next time. i noe what he meant, but that jus brought me down even more. i felt even more stupid as time goes by at the thought of why i didnt think of doing the things that he mentioned. by the time we reached the police post, i managed to get myself up on my feet and stopped blaming myself. we waited a long time before it was our turn to make the report and the few things that the police asked was the same or similar to what yiqin has asked, like why didnt we ask for help or call 999 even tho it was 3 of us and there was only 1 of him and that it was even in the public. i was already ok with that being said and was able to accept it much better. thank God!=) everything finished really late and alot of people that stayed around the area ended up coming down as well.

dennis loh, gwen, winstar. i was really glad and assured that i am indeed in the family of God=) that the family of God is indeed a place for us to find support and strength other than God Himself. thank God for you guys, every single pat on my shoulder really helped to strengthen and encourage me=)


after all these serious stuffs, some "jokes" for u all to enjoy.
-me and newell actually tried to counsel that guy because he said he felt bad due to certain things that has happened.
-me and newell heard frm him that wat happened was that he lost his wallet with lots of money inside and had no money to go home. and we offered him solutions like making police reports etc and offered to give him some money to go home!

i really cant believe we did that hahahaha! it was really practically loving our ENEMY LOL!!!

and at the same time i was telling gwen that somehow God really blessed us tho it was such a weird happening. as gaoteng was certainly alot more connected to us throughout all those happenings, he is from bedok green sec, the school we are pioneering AND he already believes in Jesus, just that he is not commited to any churches. his mum is a Christian as well. WOAH=) God really is able to bless us in all circumstance yeah?=)


but as i walked back home, the more i felt bad as i felt that i caused their phones to get stolen. tho yiqin did tell me not to condemn my own and that i did do well in being calm and in leading them. at first before we reached joseph's hse, i did feel that i still did smth right in the midst of the screw up. but i was no longer convinced because i felt that yes, i was leading them. but i caused their handphones to be stolen. and so i struggled with that the whole night and i knew that God is trying to help me learn something from it. but i didnt noe what it was.

and i slept at 3am, set my alarm at 6.35am so that i can wake up and meet my sheep for breakfast! i was realli excited and everything but when i woke up. i saw 8am on my handphone. i realli was upset and at the same time loss on what to do, because i know my sheep hates lateness not to mention that i wasnt even able der! i realli asked God on what to do. sms-ed and explain my situation. Sorry again for nt being able to be der!(if you happen to be reading this.) that it was not i did not want to be der, but i did not even hear my alarm ring! i think my body was realli quite tired out due to lack of good slp recently. praise God that He refreshed me!

not going to mention my today's happening. but one thing that i've finally come to realise and see what God was trying to help me learn today. Was that i dun tink that ytd i've led them with God's wisdom, but more on like what i think could be done. they put their trust in me leading them as well. and yes, i feel stupid still on how i handled the situation, but its no long self-condemnation but by God's grace freed from it=)

what God showed me was, this would be how i would lead God's people if im not going to lead them with God's wisdom. the stupid way of leading people, the way of the world. and one of how the greatest leader Jesus in the world came to be was that although He Himself is God, He still relied on God. and now i realli understand the importance of how leaders of God should stay real close and rely on God.

Definition of leader: its not just about the number, one may lead. As long as you have certain influence over a person's life, you are a leader already.

So this goes out not only to the CLs or whatever Ls there is. but also to ANYONE who has certain influence over someone's life.





God really thank You for opening my eyes to this! Indeed. when the tough comes, the tough just have to get tougher. its either you make it or you break it. yesterday night til today night was a whole period of struggling. i realli went down to the one of the lowest point of my life and came up anew, now reaching another peak of my spiritual life! Thank You also for being the peace within our hearts when we were facing the situation, i definitely would not have been able to be calm withut You=) praise You God. Forever and ever. J'aime Dieu. i will remember this for life.

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aloy; 11:31 PM